7/28/2013 cont.- Back in the States... Mommy,Daddy and Kristin happy to have me home!!!

On my way home, boarding in 1.5 hours... East coast here i come! Mom, Dad and Kristin are glad to have me back home. So, I am back home in MD now... work tomorrow... Lots of memories and thoughts to think about... It's 7/29 in Korea right now as they are about 13 hours ahead of us.

All the dates below are posted as they stood in Korea.

Trip of a lifetime has come to a close... I now have 19 new friends from all over the world... Korea, Denmark, Belgium, Norway, France and of course people from the West and Mid-west in the USA...  Jet-lag sucks and I go back to working in full swing tomorrow.

I have memorabilia to remember the trip, a taekwondo uniform, a new hanbok and  some other nice trinkets...
I have decided I am going to start a memory box and hang up some of the art work done by framing them.
I also will create a scrapbook with all the paperwork...

Much thanks and gratitude to HOLT and the staff of Holt for this wonderful opportunity.

Returning home was also hilarious... Going through customs was very quick: the guard thought I was 14... It's half my age but hey... That's okay... At least he had a sense of humor...

Ironies of ironies: the two people I sat next to on the plane ride out of Dulles to Incheon were the same two people I sat next to on the plane ride back home from Incheon to Dulles. They spent two weeks in China with a tour group and had a layover in Incheon. It was a mother and daughter that was vegetarian: I can't recall the mother's name but the daughter's name was Daisy; she was nine.

7/27/2013 Saying goodbye is always bittersweet...

Hello Saturday... Returned to hotel at 6am thankful that today was a low key day..As I was returning the Norweign and Chicago sisters were leaving for the airport. I left the Grand Hilton alittle after noon with a few others that were catching  the 6005 bus to the airport to take their flights home. I said goodbye to them and then went downstairs to catch the free shuttle bus to the best western premier.

I'm so tired now... Trying to get some rest tonight but not too much since I have a 13.5 hour flight ahead of me. 

I miss my friends already... Some will stay here in Seoul for something called " the gathering" the rest of us are headed home within a few days... Special thanks to the holt staff and the wonderful program they put on for us. It was insightful and enriching as well as life changing.

I am greatful for new friends... New beginnings and as some from the trip would say... YoLo -you only live once...

What happens in Seoul stays in Seoul! I have come to have a new appreciation for myself, my homeland and the culture, joys and sorrows that all of that entails.

For some they have long vacations and will stay in Korea until summer is nearly over; others will stay for just a few more weeks and others will travel the world... I.E. my new friend Martin will go to Thailand.  I hope he has the time of his life.

**Reflection of my trip:**

After vacations like these I am both saddened and happy; some would say its bittersweet. Although I came here for a purpose that did not transpose I will never lose faith in what God's plan is for me. I trust that my birth parents gave me the best life they knew how and that was to give me up for adoption 26 years ago. 

I can truly say I am at peace and can move on with my life more willingly as with an open heart.

Thank you again to all my new friends: the Danes, the Americans, the French, the Belgiums and the Norwegians... West coast to east coast and of course the new Koreans too!

Hope we all stay in touch and will somehow plan a reunion soon! 

7-26 Friday Closing time- end of program...

We have free time in the morning so I packed my belongings. we then ate lunch and then we had the closing ceremony.  For the closing ceremony my talent was the traditional Korean bow with my new Belgium friend Eun Jee. The closing banquet and ceremony was today... The banquet was held in Gangnam at a fancy hotel called Riverside. It was buffet style and delicious. The desserts especially were to die for...gelato, tiramisu and cheesecake. Partied hard core last night with the Danes... Going out tonight... Last night with my new 16 friends and holt staff.

Tomorrow I'll be moving to the best western in Incheon and staying there all night.

Can't believe this trip is coming to a close...

7-25 Thursday Gyeong- Buddist temple

I can't believe the trip is coming towards the end. Today in Gyeong-gu we saw a Buddhist temple known as the Bulguksa temple. Here we saw monks and lots and lots of stairs. On the way out we saw piles of stones.
Often in these Buddhist temples you see a symbol that looks like a German Nazi symbol but it isn't in Korea it is known as a manja and is in the opposite direction of the swastika. It is a symbol used by Buddists. It's literal translation is " the letter man" .
The tour guide described it by saying The first use of the Manja dates back to the Indus Valley Civilization that existed over 5,000 years ago. In Sanskirt, the Manja is called Srivatsalksana. And while there are four ways to express this Sanskrit word, the most common is “Srivatsa”, which literally means the shape of sea clouds where hair is curled, overlapped and intermingled. I know, it sounds a bit strange, but in context, it makes a lot more sense. Srivatsa, or Gilsanghwiseon (길상희선) or Gilsanghaewun (길상해운) in Korean, refers to one of the “Samsipisang” (삼십이상), which is just one of the thirty-two marks of excellence that existed on Seokgamoni-bul’s (The Historical Buddha) body. From his head to his toes, the Buddha was covered in these marks. It is a symbol meaning good fortune.
 Then we ate lunch which was buffet style and then we drove back to Seoul. We ate buffet style dinner too!

Now we are back in Seoul... To celebrate being back in Seoul some of us went out to norae bong and a bar called the Ho Bar. This day some of us also met some of Yujin's friends at a beer pong place... Stayed out late...

7-23 and 7-24 Gyeong and Busan

Today 7-23 we left Seoul and the Grand Hilton and drove by tour bus to gyeong-gu city. It's about 4 hours outside of Seoul. We are staying at the Hyundai hotel , generally 2 people to a room. i got to room with a Danish girl Anne Mee. She was really sweet. We viewed lots of historical places. On the tour bus we watched a Korean drama called 'Jewel in the Palace'. It was pretty interesting...

On 7-24 we went to Busan city, only about an hour outside of Seoul. Busan is the second largest port in Korea. We saw  the Busan tower and were able to see a 360 degree view of Busan from it. We ate a buffet style lunch. After lunch we went to haeundae beach and a fishery market. Went shopping at a local market and then we came back to Gyeong-gu. For dinner we ate Bulgogi again :). Busan was a beautiful city. I wish I had taken more photos... I have enough to show you all back home though.

7-22 Root Search day- confusion angst and peace

Today we will visit Holt to view our files... The root search is today as well but unfortunately, my parents did not answer the telegram sent to them. The file here in Korea is exactly like the one I have at home. I was relieved of this since sometimes the file is not the same.

It appears my birth mother received the telegram from the mailman personally herself. Both mom and dad are still living together and probably married now. They no longer live in Daegu. They now live in another district called the Choong Nam province. The city they live in is called Chun-Ahn;it's about one hour away from Seoul.The OB/GYN Partima where I was born in is no longer around.

I took a nap today for 4 hours I am exhausted. Then I went out with some girls to Insadong area for shopping; we spent 3 hours looking around in different shops. It was awesome!!

7-20 and 7-21 Homestay/ church

Our next task of the week was the much anticipated home-stay. I was one of the first to arrive downstairs in the hotel lobby. The social worker Ms.Seol introduced me to my home-stay family and Esther was nearby too.The home-stay family's last name was Choi. I said goodbye to the Holt staff and set off with them(The Choi's). They had only arrived with their domestically adopted daughter Seung Ah. On Saturday evening at 2:00PM my home-stay experience began. I was paired with a nice family who has 3 children; a 2 year old daughter, 14 year old son and 18 year old son. The youngest Seung Ah was adopted domestically through Holt. The family lives about an hour outside of Seoul. the father Taewon speaks English fairly well. He told me to call him Sam chon which means uncle in Korean. Taewon's brother lived closer to Seoul so before going to their home we visited his brother. His brother's name is Jason and therefore, I was to refer to him as Jason. 

To begin the fun we walked around some older streets of Seoul; one place we walked near was the president's house. Here in Korea it's called the blue house. It is like the equivalent of the White House in Washington D.C. to the US president. 

After walking around a bit and drinking our coffees we said goodbye to Jason and his wife.The coffee I had was a green tea latte with almonds in it. We used their bathroom first though since we had an hour drive ahead of us.

Then we drove about an hour away to the home-stay family house.When we arrived at Sam chon's home his other two children were home from school. I was introduced to them.

The two year old Seung Ah was naturally interested in the gift bag I had in my hand do, they opened the gift to satisfy her curiosity. They seemed very appreciative.

 We then went and ate pork for dinner at a local restaurant. Their original plan was to eat sushi but I was disinterested in eating raw fish so they changed dinner plans for me. After eating dinner we returned back to their home. The children decided to stay there.

Sam chon seemed very enthusiastic about taking me to a jjimjalbang( a spa/sauna). I was rather shocked at the nudity of this place even though we were seperated by gender and Sam chon had warned me about this on the car ride there. First you are in a public area where everyone is naked. You take a shower and then get into sauna's of varying   temperatures. Then my home-stay mother paid for me to get a complete scrub down. I cringed at the sight of all the dead skin cells that flaked off my body. After the scrub down you shower again and put on the uniform they supply for you to wear in the sauna room. During the sauna time you eat food and drink drinks like tea or energy drinks. Your head is wrapped with a towel like a sheep's head called "yang meori". The rooms smelt of burning wood and are varying temperatures. Most people sleep when they are in a jjimjalbang. you start in a hit room and then move to a cold room because everything must be bakanced. after this you shower once more and then return into your own personal clothes. After the sauna we came back to home-stay house and I went to bed. I was very relaxed and tired.

7/21 ~The next morning for breakfast we ate bread... Sweet honey bread, red bean bread and bacon, toast and eggs. My host family is not religious so rather than attending church we went shopping in Bundang. This district is where Taewon works as an insurance salesman. I was able to pick up more souvenirs here and then I ate noodles for lunch. They were traditional japanese noodles called udon and I ate rice balls. The home-stay family also graciously bestowed a few gifts to me prior to my leaving their home. They gave me hand-made chocolates( very expensive) and instructed me not to share them with anyone. They also gave me a compilation of Korean music that their 14 year old son downloaded and put onto a USB for my listening pleasure. The last gift was a book called "Dandelion this is how we love you"; written by Neil Park and illustrated by Yoojin Jang. This was an adoptee family story written by adoptees. Taewon says they attend a meeting at Holt once a month with Seung a to go over adoption issues and tribulations.

Then, the home-stay will be over. At 4pm I'll be joining staff member and our house mother YuJin/ Vicki to her church service. The church was an English service and is called Onnuri church. The sermon was on 2 Kings 22. Eating pizza for dinner and then going out ...The club was very crowded for a Sunday night and busy, it appears nightlife here thrives... The club was called NB2 it stands for Noise Basement 2 and had the music blasting, strobe lights going and smoke everywhere. We danced on the noise bar.

Friday 7-19, Saturday 7-20 Taekwondo and Ettiquette

Today we started doing taekwondo... It's like Korea's way if doing karate, we will continue this tomorrow 7-20. We received our own custom made uniforms. the uniform had our national flag on one sleeve and the Korean flag on the opposing sleeve. The teacher Deoksoo Jeon was a Korean adoptee as well. His adoption was domestic though and this made him a wiser man. He has been helping teach taekwondo for this camp now for three years and he is recently married. I am thankful to him for sharing his story and his journey of adoption and the struggles he faced.
We started the day off with warm-up drills of running, flexibility, and stretching... I never realized how out of shape I am till taking this class. We practiced kicking; round kicks, straight kicks and punching with our fists.
The instructor gave us a challenge to break a board the next day to receive a prize. No one's failed yet...
Then we got back onto the red tour bus and went back to the hotel took quick showers and then ate lunch; Korean McDonald's food and tried on the traditional Korean clothes hanbok.

After that we went back onto the bus to go to the Myung Won Cultural Foundation. It was an etiquette class where we were going to learn  how to bow properly make green tea and pour it properly. Sadly, this art form is slowly dying in Korea.The tea was really good. We also did the coming of age ceremony which is when a child turns 20 they receive an adult name. We received our adult names and their meanings with great gratitude.

At the tea ceremony place dinner was served, it was delicious! 

Then we had free time so I went with a group to norae bong or karaoke place called Rock Q.

I also was able to go shopping so I picked up a few things.

7/20~ We woke up to attend taekwondo again. The challenge was becoming a reality, everyone broke their board and we received our prize. It was a black belt with our Korean name engraved on it. For lunch we ate chicken again and we celebrated our Norwegian friend's Tove birthday by eating banana bread.

Thursday 7-18- Korean class, Calligraphy and FOOD...

Today we finished Korean class with Hannah Madeline. She teaches in Hong Kong now. We learned the two number systems; Korean and Sino-Korean. Then we went to Holt post adoption services(PAS to look at the babies and play with them. They were grateful to see the males since they only generally have female interaction throughout the day. We went in three separate groups, my group went first but, most of the babies were sleeping so... sadly I only got to play with one baby. Sadly, these babies cannot be adopted. 
Then we ate lunch... It was chicken today! :) It's a dish called "samgyetang" a ginseng chicken soup. It is very commonly eaten in the summertime. It is a chicken that is filled with rice, ginseng, jujubes, garlic, and ginger. It is closed shut and cooked in broth.
After lunch it was time to head off to calligraphy class. We learned about calligraphy by a famous calligrapher here in S. Korea, Byung In Kang.He has created designs for all sorts of products such as soju and he plans to make a statue like the Eiffel tower in Paris so that others can see the beauty of Korea.
 He gave us all gifts of a notebook and we did calligraphy on traditional Korean fans.When painting on the traditional Korean fans we were able to use different mediums such as sticks, sponges, forks, dowels, and pencils. He also wrote our Korean names on paper and signed it for us.

For the rest of the night we have free time...

Most of us went to eat pork belly for dinner and then we went to a cool stream in Seoul and we saw two statues General Lee and King Sejeong. King Sejeong is on the 10,000 dollar won and is famous for creating the Korean language/alphabet.

Some people are still out but a few of us wanted to get some sleep. Tomorrow is a big day...

7/17/2013 Cooking memories in recipes

Today we had Korean class and learned about the alphabet and a few phrases that would be useful. For lunch we ate at a local Korean restaurant. It was a type of soup. Then, we had Korean cooking class at the Soodoo Cooking Institute. We were greeting by chef and teacher Bo-Kyung Park the 3rd generation to own and teach at the institute. They opened the institute in 1965 and it is still family owned and operated. She taught us how to cook two traditional Korean dishes Bulgogi( a beef dish) and Jap Chae(a clear noodle and veggie dish). This was our dinner for the night, we worked in groups of three at cooking stations that had woks, stove tops, a counter and sinks to clean our hands and the food. After dinner some of us went shopping in Myeong-dong. I bought 2 new tops from a popular clothing store called uniqlo .
We all rushed after shopping to try to catch the rainbow fountain off the Banpo bridge above the Han river. Unfortunately, it wasn't running today,disappointment set in but due to the rain that had occurred earlier that day and a flood that occurred near by it wasn't running.

Then came back to the hotel to get some rest. Some others chose to go to the Gangnam district (a wealthy district about a half hour away from Seoul by bus)  but this time I chose to go back to the hotel.

7/16 Holt Visit...

Today we learned about Holt and its founders Harry and Bertha Holt. We got to meet there daughter Molly who continues the legacy. Sadly, Molly is suffering from *breast* cancer right now.

We visited 2 Holt centers- Ilsan and Seoul... the Illsan center is a facility for disabled children and adults. It was pioneered in 1961 to help families that could not care for their children due to their disabilities such as cerebral palsy, down syndrome and emotional and mental difficulties. The Holt's gave these children a chance for a normal life with the care and love of a family. 
After visiting the Illsan center we went to the main Holt building in Seoul for orientation. It was here that the ground rules for camp were laid out for us.  For lunch we ate westernized Korean food a sort of fusion. For dinner we ate at Bulgogi brothers... a very nice place where they served rice last. Then we had free time... Some of us went bowling this night and unfortunately for me I lost track of the time. Before I knew it I was tired and had no way back to the hotel. Everyone else had already left for the night after sightseeing or they wanted to stay out later. To make a long story short, the house mother YuJin had to help me get a cab at midnight or slightly before midnight which was a nightmare... It's quite difficult to get a cab until after midnight because their rates go up.
    Luckily, she was able to call a cab for me but I was unaware that I would be taking the cab back to the hotel by myself. This was an interesting start to the trip... I felt horrible afterwards though because she was missing out on all the fun that others were participating in, they all went to a bar in hongdae.

    I came here to learn Korean  and the culture and become more familiar with words, but I was also here to seek out my birth parents.
I had  to remind myself why I had come on this trip in the first place...the whole reason for being here is happy trail camp... I have to become more independent and understanding of the other participants and not be afraid to go back to the hotel if I am tired.
Pondering and reflecting...

7/14 to 7/15~ Arriving at the Hotel and meeting participants

          In Seoul Korea now... Woke up at 3:00AM on 7/15 to call my parents. I figured I hadn't talked to them for two days and that it would be wise to talk to them to let them know I landed in Incheon safely and had arrived at the hotel. It was rather lonely without them to talk to. My phone card didn't work so I got charged for the quick phone call. My parents were grateful for the call though since it was now 4pm back in the states. They were glad I had arrived safely and slept through the night.

        After talking to my parents, I went back to sleep and woke up again at about 11AM in Korea. I watched some television mainly cartoons and some Korean drama that I can't recall. It was kinda fun to watch cartoons like Sponge-bob in another language. I also was watching "Sex in the City". 

        After all this going on on 7/14 till 7/15 I packed up my belongings  from the main hotel building by about 1:30PM and headed  down the hill to Suite A where I would spend the majority of my time in Seoul.
   I unpacked  all my belongings and ventured out of the room to get to know the other participants. It's muggy and hot here... It isn't raining today thankfully. There's 17 of us!!!

Participants are from USA, Denmark, Belgium, France and Norway. US participants are from Chicago, LA- California, Seattle and Oregon. We all ate chicken for dinner with kimchi. We played an ice breaker game to get to know each other by stating our name, where we were from and a descriptor of ourselves. My word was short/vertically challenged. 

  After dinner about 2/3rds of us went to explore Seoul.. We all sang at a norae bong called Prince Edward. I bought face wash here as well, skin food brand since I accidentally left mine at home... I also talked with Ms. Seol my social worker today and found out the sad news that it is not possible to meet my foster mother now in Seoul... It turns out for a short time ,I had a foster mother in Taegu as well. A new law was passed just last August that you can only have contact with the foster parent if Holt still has them working for them. Another social worker Esther was telling us of this new law earlier in the day and was rather bothered by it.

I also discovered for a brief time I was hospitalized in an incubator in Partima OB/GYN because I was born 2 months early.

The silver lining... My birth mother and father are both still alive...A telegram was sent to them but no word on a verdict yet. The root search and meeting takes place on the 22nd of July...
Everyone here seems pretty awesome. The women outnumber the men...I found this to be an interesting demographic. There were five men and eleven women.
Another interesting note about the participants is that a large sum of us are teachers or in the field of education.
I get a camp t-shirt, a badge with my name on it and I was measured for a hanbok... We all will receive a hanbok to bring home with us. :)

Seoul Korea 7/13 and 7/14 airport jive

US travel date was 7/13. I left Dulles Airport(IAD) at 1:55PM only to arrive at the Incheon International Airport (ICN) fourteen hours later. For the plane ride I spend the majority of my time watching movies on the little television screen in front of me and sleeping. I watched four movies "Pride and Prejudice", "The Admission", "Up" and "Chicago". I took three naps all of which were two hour increments. Once I arrived at the airport I had forgotten to fill out the paperwork that was to be given on the plane ride over so I went to get through customs and realized I needed to fill out the paperwork. I quickly gathered my belongings and went to get the paperwork in front of the customs line. I filled out the visitor and customs paperwork and returned into the line to check in. I then proceeded through the customs line quickly and went to pick-up my bags from baggage claim. I then headed down to gate 5B to catch the 6005 bus to the Grand Hilton Seoul. This night I was staying in the main hotel building since the program for Holt doesn't start till 7/15. The bus ride was about 50 minutes long and I was tired. I ordered room service for dinner and then went to sleep. Check-out the next day was by noon but the hotel extended my check-out till 3pm. I left the main building by 2pm. 

The adventure begins...

So... The adventure begins... This trip has been on my mind for the past four years... It all started for me in 2009 when I went abroad to to birth country to teach English. I was born in Taegu, South Korea... This story is a difficult one to write but, one that must be shared in hopes of understanding myself more deeply.

I never had felt so out of place in my life... I looked like all those around me and yet I just didn't fit in... Most of my life was spent as a "distant outsider". You see growing up in hoco or Howard county made this identity crisis more of an issue. Especially in high school where the populations of Koreans was about 40%.

I was and still am known as a Twinkie or banana to all those born in Korea and raised in Korea kids that immigrated to the US. 

Anyways... I have always had questions... So many questions and four years ago some of those questions were answered. Now I am curious is there new information or missing information. I am very blessed to be going on this journey and the weight of wanting to meet my foster and birth mother weighs on me everyday. I am hoping to make a few dreams of mine  reality but I know my faith will carry me through it all. I put my trust in god and believe everything happens for a reason...so now four years later I am embarking deeper into this search and looking for some closure and peace of mind. 

A journey becoming a reality and a trip that will change my life drastically. I am excited, nervous and excited some more... I thank god everyday for what he has given me and am thankful to work with catholic charities. The social worker there is phenomenal and very helpful. She helped me begin this process four years ago. Last year I had the opportunity to take this trip but was shut out. They only accept 20 applicants as I stated in an earlier blog post. This year is different I was accepted into the program and my feelings are the same. Mostly I just want to know basic stuff but, especially medical history. I like the programs name"happy trail" it leads me to believe the ending will be a happy one.

Anyhow... I'll be in Seoul,Korea in just 3 days! Peace out till I reach my destination.  

New information

So... My flight to S. Korea is now in 5 days. It's really official that I'm going! 

There are new developments. They're 17 of us attending this lifetime adventure from Europe and the US!!! 

I am certain I will never be the same but it is all for the better. I will be at peace finally... This camp looks as though it will be amazing!!!:)

Just one week to go...

In just one short week I'll be on my way to Seoul, South Korea. 

I can't believe it... Mixed feelings about this trip, going through Holt international. 

A blessing on my beginnings here as an infant... So many unanswered questions answered and the opportunity of a lifetime. I feel as though I am going home. Born in Taegu, South Korea and raised in Maryland. 

I will get to see my birth file first hand and  get to learn about the culture in S. Korea.

Words can hardly describe how thankful I am for my parents. They are supporting me on this journey for truth and peace of mind.

They have been my biggest supporters through all of this along with my older sister who was also adopted from S. Korea. 

I am Blessed

The registration fee money wired over to Seoul was well received! This means they got the money! The final piece of the beginning stages of going to Korea are completed.

I can't believe it; I'm going in July.

The next update will most likely be in July when I arrive there. 

So excited to have the opportunity to meet 19 other adoptees from Korea that were adopted by US or European families.

Feeling very blessed!!!

Thankful for this once in a lifetime opportunity to see my place of birth and to experience it first hand!!!

:)

Counting down the days now... So excited! Down to three more weeks it's officially a month away!

Leaving July 13th :)

Registration fee...

Filled out paperwork to wire over the registration fee to Seoul. I just sent Holt the pre survey and flight arrangements.

Waiting to make sure they receive everything they need.

This is a reality that I am going...

I can't wait to explore Korea's capital Seoul and down South at Busan and Gyeong-ju districts.

I was born in Taegu perhaps I'll visit there soon too...

Airline ticket

So, today with my dad's help I purchased my airline ticket to go to Seoul! Flying Korean Air leaving 7/13 and returning 7/28. Everything is falling into place. 

Last steps are to email holt the itinerary for the flight, the pre-survey and to go to the bank to make sure $100 USD is sent to them.

South Korea 2013- humble beginnings to finding my roots

So it's official as of May 15th I was accepted with others to go abroad to South Korea for 2 weeks in search of my biological roots and such...
Trip will not begin until July 13th till the 27th... The Koreans are 13 hours ahead of us so for them it's the 15-26th of July.
Paperwork is in motion and I will update more when I get there in July, if I make it...

 All I have to pay for is airfare and personal expenses... No problem right? Wrong! Airfare goes up daily and I still have the $100 fee for processing Korean to English and vice versa.

Thank goodness I have a few months to prepare... What a great opportunity- almost once in a lifetime chance to go back to where I was born= priceless!!!